Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Duck (and cover)


I'm SO not in the mood for this battle today. I am not. I am not. I am not. It doesn't matter what it is - it's a battle I've fought for six years, every year at about this time, and if it were just a battle within myself it would be one thing, but it's a battle with someone whose will is as strong as pig iron.

I have no idea what pig iron is. It just brought to mind pig-headedness multiplied by iron. Please forgive me if pig iron is actually soft and malleable.

I've tried every resource I know - I've enlisted specialists and people educated to help break the bricks in this particular wall. I've prayed. I've cried. I've begged. I've threatened. I've bargained. I've cajoled.

I'm pretty sure I've yelled and thrown things.

And yet. Here we are. Stuck in the same pattern. Unable to reach a resolution.

There is nothing important enough to this particular person (who happens to be one of my sweet, darling children) to make him change the way he does things. There is nothing I can threaten to take away that causes any response whatsoever. There are no chores that I can add to his plate to make him want to complete the task set before him.

He doesn't want to do it. And when he doesn't want to do it, there's very little that I can do about it.

But it isn't optional. It's something that I require of him - that his father requires of him - that life requires of him.

And so. We sit here at the impasse I like to call Tuesday, faced with this gargantuan (to him) task on one side and the tennis lessons on the other. It's like a soap opera with a cliffhanger ending - waiting to see what will happen - which will win out.

And I'm tired of the suspense and the drama. I'd like a nice romcom, with a predictable ending, thank you very much.

Boy meets task, boy loves task, boy finishes task, boy plays tennis.

Instead, I'll set my clock and watch the minutes tick away, holding my breath and praying he gets it done so I can watch him play and laugh instead of scowl and sigh.

And tomorrow, we'll try all over again.