Tuesday, April 13, 2010

How-To Guide: The Procrastination Edition

Watching the Paint Peel

I thought I would walk you through a day in the life of a top-notch procrastinator.

That would, of course, be me.

Today, we had planned to meet up with a group of homeschoolers at a park nearby, but the rain kept us in, and honestly? I was kind of glad. I wanted to go, but I also wanted to find a little time to work on a drawing or painting or something visually artistic and creatively engaging.

So. After we finished ciphering for the day, and eating lunch, and playing with the dogs and, oh - who knows what else, I sent the boys downstairs to clean their cesspool room.  I figured I'd have an hour or two of quiet time and get something done.


Let me just walk you through what happens during two hours of quality procrastinating:

  1. Sit down with mind-mapping notebook.
  2. Stare at paper.
  3. Decide I need a snack.
  4. Go to kitchen - look for snack in basket on top of fridge.
  5. Feel nasty greasy residue on top of fridge. shudder.
  6. Mix up a batch of Mrs. Meyer's lemon verbena cleaner and grab kitchen chair to get to top of fridge easily.
  7. See grimy build-up on cabinet doors, and pretty much everything else in kitchen.
  8. Cry a little.
  9. Start spraying at top of wall and work my way down.
  10. Notice how much Mrs. Meyer's lemon verbena smells like my Aveda salon.
  11. Smile a little.
  12. Go through an entire roll of paper towels while scrubbing all vertical and horizontal surfaces in my entire kitchen.
  13. Realize I forgot to eat my snack.
  14. Steal some of Joshua's popcorn.
  15. Two hours later, stop, look around, smile, sniff.
  16. Clean out sink and put cleaner away.
  17. Receive text from Dr. SmartyPants that he's on the way home.
  18. Realize I forgot to cook supper.
  19. Realize there's no freakin' way I'm cooking dinner in this sparkly clean kitchen.
  20. Order pizza.
And that, people, is how it is done. Not one piece of art paper was harmed in the making of this list.

(although one entire tree's worth of paper towels were eradicated from the planet. go earth month. woot.)